Into The Light
I am not a poet, but in honor of my mother’s great and noble soul, I tried.
Auf Wiedersehen - For Gabriele Rico,  July 11, 1937 – March 15th, 2013
I will not say goodbye
The word too final.
Death and taxes, they say
No, not for me.
Life flies, soft winged, out the window.
I gotcha mama, whispers and a million tears.
But it is really you who have me
Curled and cradled, deathless
In the palm of your hand.
Where are you now, mama?
In a place where bombs and pain can’t reach.
Your feet dance, small steps forward.
And in the twilight, a hand shimmers
Beckoning your seven-year-old self
Into the rose-colored gloom.
Rosy
Suzi & Ethan, Steph & Todd, Simone & Chris, Rich, Griff, Ado, Tia, & Sasha,
I’m so sorry to hear that Gabriele passed away. I am relieved that her suffering is over and I pray that you will all have strength during this next phase of life without Nana Gabriele.
Bridget, Mark & family
Good-bye Gabriele–one the bravest souls we knew, whose light burns on in the hearts of so many who knew and loved her at San Jose State and around the world. She led so many on the way to being ourselves, even as she was becoming only her beautiful essence. In that she remains. “Into the rose-colored gloom.” Indeed. A sad, beautiful way to describe that place where all souls touch at the end. Your poem courageously celebrates both her life and death–her “task at hand.” We offer our love and support to Richard who we know well, and to Suzanne, Stephanie, and Simone and to the entire Rico family.
You may know this poem by William Wordsworth, a poem about returning to the earth, which has been a comfort to many at such hard moments:
“A slumber did my spirit seal;
I had no human fears:
She seemed a thing that could not feel
The touch of earthly years.
No motion has she now, no force;
She neither hears nor sees;
Rolled round in earth’s diurnal course,
With rocks, and stones, and trees.”
Alan Soldofsky
Pamela Pennington
Suzanne, this was the first thing I read this morning. My heart aches for you and your family. I’m praying for all of you.
What a beautiful tribute. My heart aches for you, Suzanne.
Wishing you peace, love and light. xo
So sorry to know this sad news. But she will always be with you and your family.
robert and simo
I’m so sorry. I know how it hurts. Blessings.
The love that surrounded her and the bravery of her fight were remarkable. I believe her soul soars. My sympathy to you, Suzanne, and the rest of the family.
Thank you for the elegeant way that you shared your mother’s life story and final days. Peace and love to you Ethan and the boys. Grieve well, cry alot and live fully in her memory.
Dear Suzanne,
It is hard to find words – specially in my limited English. You and your family have my deepest sympathy. Even though I knew that it would happen, I feel very, very sad. Gabriele was so full of life and plans when I met her…
I wish you time and space for mourning. That her suffering is over might give some comfort.
Love, Petra
A great light has left the world, but she left it a much better place. She was a shining example to all of how to live life to the fullest! What a blessing it was that she had all of you there with her. Our hearts are broken for you- You are in our thoughts and prayers!
With Love and Sympathy,
Rosalyn, RIch & Drake Shook
I’m sad with you in your loss, Suzanne. Sending all my love in a giant, warm hug. In peace.
Vicki
As I meditate on light each morning, I feel her dancing with me!
What a beautiful way to honor your mother. May you grieve in peace.
-J
My Sister is at peace at last… Her suffering is over… she fought a gallant battle… the love and caring of all of you… the prayers and thoughts of the many outsiders are with you now at this moment of loss. The daily comforts that you all gave your mom will last in your hearts and minds forever. She will continue to remain in your presence as her mark was left on all of you… as someone who has known her for over 56 years… I mourn her passing, but I know she’s in a better place…
With love and lingering thoughts… Be Well.
Uncle Doug
Oh Suzi, I’m so sad to hear this news. I’ve been following your journey with your mom and am sorry for the struggle you’ve all just endured. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
I am so sad to hear of your mother’s passing. But her suffering is now over. Your sharing intimately of her battle was beautiful and heartfelt by all of us who knew her. In her book, Pain and Possibility, she included a poem of mine which seems sadly appropos. I want you to know that I use her works in my teaching to inspire students, like she inspired me, to write to discover and then to explore our deepest fears and to confront the obstacles that bring us pain. You have clearly learned well Gabriele’s greatest gift. May God bless you and your family. Peace and love.
Peter Fjeld
Suzanne, I am so sorry sweety. She fought hard & looked the shedding of this mortal life, dead in the face, and challenged it toe to toe, eye to eye, & heart to heart. Not many people can say they did that. I KNOW FOR SURE that her light is awake & all around you and your beautiful family. I send hugs upon hugs upon hugs to you & your family. LOVELOVELOVE, The Eddy family
Suzanne, you and your wonderful mom have been through such an extraordinary journey. Your post about the Chinese medicine doctor saying she was literally living off qi was astounding- I know how devastating and horrible it must feel right now, but there is no doubt in my mind when our time comes our mothers, grandmothers, fathers will be there waiting for us again. You and your family did so much for her health and comfort, for someone so ill her face in your photos always showed so much beauty and joy. I wish I’d known this amazing woman in this life- but you can bet in the next one I’ll be knocking on her door . I love you honey- so so sorry not have the physical embrace of the first and deepest love we will ever have, if one is fortunate enough to have a wonderful mother. But she’s going to be there for you, she’ll visit you in your dreams and you’ll wake up with your heart full from her presence. Love to you, Ethan, your gorgeous boys and wonderful sisters.
Sorry for your loss and thanks for sharing your mom.
Gabriele’s grace and the light of your words have illuminated a path for us to accept her passing. She will be missed, to be sure, but the indelible gift of how she lived her life and how she faced death will live on through all of those who were blessed to have known and loved her.
Love you. Sending you hugs.
I am sending my Love to you all!! What a beautiful spirit we all were blessed to know…and that will never die!! She truly was an Angel sent to earth…she left such a legacy in her Loving family and many friends and in all the lives she touched! Her life’s purpose fulfilled! Hugs and Love and May we all follow Gabriele’s example of peace and grace!!
Thinking of you and sending love love love!!
Oh dear, Suzanne! Thinking of you…. and here are a few words that helped when my father passed: “Neither fire nor wind, destruction nor death can erase our good deeds or the love we leave behind” To have had the love of a mother like yours is truly awe-inspiring. Thanks for sharing her with us! Much love and peace for you and your family…
So sorry to be waking up to this news. My arms wrap around you and your family. Your mom was a poster child of someone who lived, loved and embraced life to the fullest, and one in her final hours let the light take over her body with such dignity and grace. You were are so lucky to have loved so much. Love to all of you. Kerry
Oh, Suzanne! I’m so sorry for your loss! It’s clear Gabriele was a wonderful spirit who passed it on to you and your sister. Know that her example lives on in you. You are still blessed. The tribute you’ve given her over these last months has been heart wrenching, but delicately beautiful. My sincerest condolences. Sylvia
I am so sorry for your loss. Sending you all so much love and strength during this challenging time. XO
Oh Suzanne …no words … love you …
Suz, i just wrote you about this, also, correct the wiedersehen spelling in the first line, although Ethan probably already caught it.
I love you. You are amazing. love steph Stephanie Rico 408-483-0043 (cell)
________________________________
Es tut mit leid.
Mach’s gut.
My heart is sad at Gabriele’s passing, but I am also feeling blessed to have known her. Thank you for sharing Gabriele’s journey and your family’s journey with all of us. Hugs and love to you all. Kathleen
Dear Suzanne, I am so sorry for your loss. I know what you are going through because I lost my Mother 15 months ago and I miss her each and every day. please cherish her memory, her love shared with you and the time you had with her. the pain will lessen and you will always be happy to have had such a wonderfully strong and caring mother in your life. I am sending you much love, prayers and hugs for you and your family at this very sad time and always. sincerely, Mary Davis
My heart aches for your whole family Suzanne. I’ve been reading your blog and you and your mom have been on my mind for some time now. My father passed away a little over a year ago so I know your pain. Your lucky to have such a beautiful family to get you through this. I loved the post of you describing how much your mother loved her home. Cupertino and the Valley have always held a special place in my heart (go MV!) and I’m sure your mother was very comforted to be at home and be surrounded by her plants, paintings and family. Thank you for sharing this journey with us. I’ve had a good cry this morning along with my cup of coffee. God bless you Gabrielle!
Dear Richard, Suzanne, Stephanie, Simone and all of the family:
My heart goes out to you all during this difficult time.
I know that it is may be hard to see right now, but having had this transition period with her is such a gift for all of you, and for your children.
I believe that the ideal passing is one where the soul, or essence is involved in the decision.
I first experienced this with my dear Grandma Jeanette Tenenbaum, (who loved Gabriele so much!). She was Richard’s beloved Aunt, and was so thrilled when he met your beautiful Mother.
I was fortunate enough to have her spend her last days with my family and me in our home, and was able to witness her happiness in her final days as she was surrounded by loving family. We observed as she concluded that her time on this earth was over, and she made the decision that it was time to move on.
I know she will be waiting for Gabriele with open arms.
Gabriele loved you all so completely, and especially those adorable Grandchildren. Her legacy will be the lingering of that love in all of Your hearts.
Love, Love, Love,
Roberta
I am so sorry about Gabriele …We have many fond memories of your Mom and Richard on our boat, scuba diving together…she was such a positive and happy person.
Steve and Kathy Irwin
Oh, Suzanne…my heart goes out to you. Sending you a blanket of love and healing prayers. I truly believe, even though the physically die, they are right by us, always. oxoxoxox
My warmest thoughts to you and your family. Gabriele’s grace and your eloquence in sharing your journey have been extraordinary. Thank you for including us in.
So very sorry, so much love, so much hurt. May the peace she had steal into ever crevice of your soul and stay lodged there, holding you.
My deepest sympathy to you and your family. Gabriele definetly made a difference with you and your beautiful family. Thank you very much for sharing her love.
So sorry, Suzanne!
So sad to hear this news. I am a better person for having known her. My love to you and the family.
Suzanne,
We don’t know each other although we are neighbors. I watched you every morning on TV. Then I found your blog and followed your adventures, with total enjoyment and envy. And then I walked with you through your mother’s journey. My mother and my best friend passed within the last five weeks and when I read this morning of your mother’s passing, I feel I have lost another person close to me, thanks to your generosity of sharing with all who know you and those who don’t, like myself. Heaven has been graced with three strong, brave and extraordinary women. I extend my deepest condolences to you and your family.
My heart aches for you all. You are never prepared for death. But I know she was so lucky to be surrounded by your love and care for her and each other. All my love.
That was a lovely tribute Suzzane. Even on New Year the tune of the song makes me cry. Her journey is done in this valley of death and she filled it with laughter, joy and awesome memories. I only knew her from your site yet I feel I know what an old soul she is. God Bless you all for enduring such a heavy sentence and for making the best out of it. Classiest of exits for Gabriele. May she rest in peace! Love you! -Nina
I am at a loss for the right words to express how sorry I am for you and your entire family. Anyone who know you knows how special your mother was to have raised such a beautiful, kind, loving daughter. My thoughts are with you. Please let me know if there is anything at all we can do for you.
With much love and sorrow,
Judy
I’m so sorry Suzanne! My heart goes out to you and your family. Thank god for all the love surrounding you and your dear mother this whole journey. Sending you warm hugs through the ether. Close your eyes and feel them when you need a little comfort. You’ll be in our thoughts and hearts here.
I’m so sorry for you and all of your family, Suzi. I’m sure Gabi’s in a better place. She was a wonderful person, and she’ll definitely be missed.
Suzanne, thank you for the gift of sharing this experience with us. Your mother was an inspiration, and so are you. I’ve followed you ever since you were writing about your family travels in Argentina; now these past months I’ve followed you and your mother on a different journey, one we must all take. If we’re lucky, we’ll be surrounded by love. Condolences to you and your sisters.
I’m so sorry suzanne, peace and prayers to you and yours, at this time…
Suzanne, my heart goes to you and your family as you lovingly send your mom to her next adventure…thank you for showing us all the ultimate in love and care. Her journey was brave and so filled with love in so many ways and the gift of your writing and sharing is a beautiful tribute to a life of love she (and you) live. My thoughts, prayers and love are with you always!
So sorry for your loss.
With much love, Linda
The tears are streaming down my face – I couldn’t be more saddened for your entire families loss Suz! You truly are amazing and she has left us knowing the love that surrounded her was overwhelming and i know she is now in a peaceful place! I love you all and am incredibly sorry!
Very sorry for Your loss, A prayer for peace and comfort for your Family ,
We ,your extended Family, thank you for bringing us along.
I asked my Mom to give Gabi a hug for me.
They are so courageous, those who have gone before us,
to our journeys home, where we’ll never say goodbye again.
My saddened heart goes out to each and every one of you who loved Gabriele so much. All the years I have had the pleasure to know her I will cherish for she was an inspiration on many levels and will remain so. What a beautiful soul. Rest in peace Gabi.
With love, Suse
The news of your mom’s passing makes my heart ache and I know how hard this must be for you and your family. But oh what wonderful words of tribute to her over the past several months. You left nothing unsaid and she will carry those words and thoughts with her forever, just as her words and spirit will always be present in you.
When we were her students, she had us write poems, including Bantu…
“A blond head
Light played on her and glinted off, and warmth, too”
My thoughts to her whole family,
Irina
Gabriele. May you dance in peace with stars and galaxies. Thank you.
Wow! Suzanne this is really deep! My sincerest condolences. Such courage you have. I just saw this at 12:30 pm on Sat. As your mom dances her way to Heaven, thank God for her peaceful sleep and the Angels who camped around her making sure that she gets there safely! While her spirit rejoices,
may your heart be glad for her soul is resting in the the hands of the almighty!
Dear Stephanie, Suzi and Simone;
You were so young when I meet you all and your Mom was this bright eneregtic woman who plucked me out of a sad place, embraced me, made me feel at home, safe and loved. I am one of the many poeple that she touch in a profound way. I am grateful that Suzi shared this journey and I have been able to quietly say my good-byes from here on the east coast.Gabriele is an inspiration as she faced death as much as how she lived here life. Her spirit is so strong…
I wish you time to grieve and heal. I wish you peace and comfort. I know you are surrounded by amazing love and a beautiful family. Peace to Rich as well. My sympathies and love to you all.
Peggy
It has been our privilege and joy to be in this world with Gabriele and to share her last months in her company and yours. Our deepest sympathy goes to you and your family for your loss. She is, indeed, dancing with the angels now.
mixed emotions…..happy that she is through her suffering, sad that we will not have her live voice anymore…happy that she will live on here and through all her daughters…her essence, as the lady said….it is alive and well….it is everywhere…
It is remarkable in one’s life to positively influence one person. But it is an extraordinary for someone to have the ability to touch and inspire so many. Good energy, thoughts and blessings to you and your family
I first saw your post about your mother’s transition this morning at 6 a.m. but have only been able to respond via Internet now. I know what it is to lose a loved one whose brilliant shine for life propels us forward. It was my pleasure to have a brief contact with her last year, and I have followed your beautifully articulated, moving journey with deep appreciation. When we lose parents, no words can assuage the grief, so I’ll just say that i am very sorry for your loss. She is still very much with you and the rest of her lovely family, I’m sure.
Dying with undecided love as she did, is living life. She was blessed
Blessing of love and light for all of you. Gabriele’s love and inspiration is with all of us. Thank you for all your beautiful writing and photos. So sorry and saddened by the loss.
Suzanne, I am so sorry for your loss. You brought Gabrielle to all of us who did not know her and made it feel like she was part of our family too.
It was an honour to have known Gabriele. It is a comfort to know that her soul lives on in another world and we shall all meet up with her there, one day. God bless you all and comfort you in your sad loss. With love from Valerie and all in Stuttgart.
From: Walking Papers Blog To: vakral@gmx.de Sent: Saturday, March 16, 2013 1:01 PM Subject: [New post] Auf Wiedersehen
walkingpapers posted: ” I am not a poet, but in honor of my mother’s great and noble soul, I tried. Auf Weidersehen – For Gabriele Rico, July 11, 1937 – March 15th, 2013 I will not say goodbye The word too final. Death and taxes, they say No, not for me. &”
So very sorry to hear this Suzanne. Gabriele was like a second Mom to me in so many ways while we were growing up. Such a simpler time, without a worry of our parents leaving us – seemingly indestructible and invaluable in their love, guidance and support. Your Mom is such an incredible person – and my refusal to use past tense is by no means accidental. Her bright spirit, infectious laugh and incredible brilliance will live with us all. . . Forever. My love and thoughts are with you and your family. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you – as always.
Thanks for bravely sharing your family’s loss.
Suzanne… my heart is sad, i have a lump in my throat. i will always see that smiling image of her. I remember her beautiful writing and your beautiful and touching stories are the result of her amazing talent, so she will go on through you. My love and thoughts, prayers and hugs are with you and the whole family
Darling Suzanne,Iam so sorry . Thank you for sharing your amazing Mother with all of us,I felt the love she brought to you. She’s rejoicing in Heaven now. Much love to you and your family. Carly
Sent from my iPhone
So sorry for your loss Suzanne. I feel like I have known your Mom all my life. So many things I would relate to with my Mom through your stories. My thoughts and feelings are you and your family.
Auf Wiedersehen, what a beautiful, touching and moving way to say farewell to your beloved mother. Suzanne, you have been amazing in sharing this agonizing year with us. Thanks to it, we who knew Gabi, will keep her memory alive. She was an amazing woman and so are you.
My heartfelt condolences to you, Stephanie, Simone and Richard
Bless you and your family, Suzanne. I am so thankful for what you have shared about your mom. What a beautiful woman she was. I love how you were able to spend time with her through this. I was not able to be with my mom on her passing. The triplets were three and literally climbing the walls. My hope is that she knew how much she was loved. Your mom is well loved.
Love, Donna Guske
Sent from my iPhone
We are so sorry to know this sad new. Gabrielle left this world for peace with many love from her family . Thought and love to all of you.
Dearest Ones, Although I did not know Gabrielle but for a brief moment in time and space, we have know one another for Eternity.
Death is nothing at all
I have slipped away into the next room
I am I, and you are you
What ever we were to each other
that we are still
Call me by my old familiar name
Speak to me in the easy way you always used
Put no difference into your tone
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed
at the little jokes we always enjoyed together
Play, smile, think of me. Pray for me
Let my name be ever the household word
that it always was
Lit it be spoken without effect
Without the trace of a shadow on it
Life means all that it ever meant
It is the same as it ever was
There is absolute unbroken continuity
Why should I be out of mind
because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you
For an interval
Somewhere. Very near,
Just around the corner. All is well.
Nothing is past; nothing is lost
One brief moment and all will be as it was before
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting
When we meet again!
Canon Henry Scott-Holland
Sending you a big bear hug, from your South Dakota friend.
Steph/Susie/Simone My Heart goes out to you and all the family for the loss of a wonderful lady, mother, grandmother and friend to many. No more suffering and pain for her, but what pain we have will, with time heal. God speed to Gabi on her way to another rewarding life, until we meet again. Harvey
Please accept my sympathy.
Dear Suzanne, Stephanie, Simone & Rich,
I just wanted to thank you so much for your postings about Gabrielle’s “Adventure” and yours. It is a true blessing that you were all able to be so closely together this last year and to say “Good-Byes” and for Gabrielle to be able to be in her own home at the end (and so lucid). She will be greatly missed. I was a former student or hers as well as a TA under her beautiful wings at SJSU. I will carry her in my heart–always. Love to you and your entire family and may these coming months of grief and recovery from your loss be gentle with you. And thank you, Angel-Gabrielle, for your blessing my life with your presence. I will think of you every time I look at that right hand star in Orion’s belt and think of your twinkling Spirit. Love, Melody
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I am so sorry for your loss. May your mom rest in peace.
We lost our daughter some eight months ago. Her name was also Gabriele. We called her Gaby. Huffygirl’s blog about your mom caught my eye.
Love, Aunty Uta.
What a beautiful and fitting tribute to your beautiful mom. Thank you for sharing. Sending much love and comfort.
So very sad. Wish there were words to stop your pain.
The same family that supported Gabrielle, still surrounds you.
Let go, rest and heal.
Love to all.
Diane and Eloy
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Lovely Susanne. So sorry for you loss. May joyful and loving memories take over the sadness you currently feel. Bless you.
ann
Oh, Suzanne, I am so sorry to hear about Gabrielle’s passing. My heart goes out to you and your whole family. What an amazing woman she was, what an incredible role model and inspiration to you, and to us all. You are your mother’s daughter, and that is clear. What a beautiful tribute you have given her. What a gift you have been to each other.
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Suzanne and the family of Gabrielle Rico….My sincere condolences and care to you in the passing of Garbrielle. That photograph of Gabrielle and your poem, Suzanne, startle with beauty and mystery. “I gotcha Mom whispers and a million tears…” … “and in the twilight a hand shimmers” hold that beauty and mystery for me.
I didn’t know Gabrielle personally but have admired her work for a very long time. We are both published by Jeremy P. Tarcher (prince of a man). My books are about poetry and healing.
I’ve felt a solidarity with your mother on the power of writing to change lives. When I was writing my book in the mid 90′s Jeremy sent me Pain and Possibility. That was affirmation and blessing. I will attend the memorial. With kind regards, John Fox
Dear Suzanne … So sorry to read such saddening news. Although I haven’t personally known your mother, but she seems to have been an inspiration to a lot of people. May her memory live through her good deeds. Nahla
Dear Suzanne, So sorry for the loss of your mother. Please express my consolences to your family as well.
I met your mother in Galveston, Texas, about two years ago and have subscribed to your blog for about a year now.
She was a lovely lady, full of life, and I got a lot of value from her teaching a writing workshop at University of Texas Medical Branch’s OLLI program. I continued in a private consultation with Gabriele and we exchanged several emails. It seemed simple for her to help me find a structure for my memoir, and I remember the light going off in my head when she suggested one that sounded perfect.
When I shared my cluster writing exercise with your mother, she asked if she could publish it in her next book. I don’t know if she ever got to complete the book because she got sick shortly after that. Either way, her cluster technique opened me up to new ways of writing and I am very grateful for her contribution to my life.
Having lost a parent and many close people to me through the years, I know the roller coaster of emotions you may experience. May your memories warm your heart, and may the words of those whose lives your mother touched bring peace to you and your family.
I am deeply sorry on the loss of your sweet mother. Much peace and love to you and your family.
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Dear Suzanne,
I am so sorry to hear about Gabriele’s death. She had such a significant influence on my life and helped to put me on the right path at a time when I really needed it. I am forever grateful to her.
Best wishes to you and your sisters.
Love,
Cindy
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